(Warning: This post is a self-indulgent and has absolutely nothing to do with fashion. It is, however, the story of how I began to listen, love and respect myself again. If you read this post in it's entirety, I owe you a cupcake.)
Today, June 26, 2010, marks the one year anniversary of the day I moved into my own apartment. It is also the one year anniversary of the end of my previous relationship. It's funny how much my life has changed and how much I have changed over the past year. Thinking through the obstacles I've overcome and the moments that I almost gave up on my career, my passions and myself, it's a miracle that I'm still living in NYC.
The day that I moved out of "our" apartment and into MY apartment was the day that changed everything. I stopped having to question every decision I made (or wanted to make). I stopped having to wonder how someone else would feel about my opinions, my choice of friends or even my weekly nail polish. I had reached a level of emotional exhaustion I didn't know I was capable of and certainly don't ever want to experience again. Sitting on the floor of my apartment, next to a single air mattress, and holding my dog, I sank into the silence. All was quiet & still. I had moments (even hours) to be alone with...me.
Since that day, I have gone through an array of emotions. Sure, I've felt insecure and lonely but I've also felt exhilarated, creative and incredibly in touch with myself. No longer do I have to wonder "what if?" - I can instead ask myself "why not?". I've been able to dive deeper to understand who I truly am and considered who I want to be. No one tells me who I am, who they want me to be or how I should feel. It's in these moments that you begin to hear your own voice. Once you begin to listen to your own voice, there's no limit to what you can do.
Don't ever let anyone make you feel that you aren't good enough or that your dreams are unrealistic (i believe the exact name for mine was a "fairy tale"). Who cares that you're an overweight girl living in Arkansas with dreams of working in fashion? You can achieve any and every thing that you want to achieve in life, as long as you work hard and continue to pursue your passions. The threats of "you'll never find anyone better" or "you'll be miserable for the rest of your life" are unfounded and ridiculous, even though in the heat of the moment, it might feel like the most realistic threat in the world.
Please remember that no one can make you feel any way unless you allow them to. If you are unhappy, only you have the power to change your situation. Make a positive change in your life daily (no matter how small) and you'd be surprised at how much of an impact these changes can make.
One year later, I'm more successful, happier, and confident than I ever could have imagined I would be. Imagine where I may be in a year from now? The possibilities are endless.
Tonight, I took a near 30 block stroll with my friend, 
As some of you may or may not know, I recently went through a traumatic breakup. In fact, calling just the breakup traumatic would be an understatement, as the entire three year relationship was a tumultuous experiment in disaster. Somehow, after all the times I felt trapped, depressed, unintelligent and a slew of other descriptive words, I managed to make it out alive. On the other side, I emerged moderately bruised but with a renewed passion to rediscover all the bits and pieces that make me.........me.
As you've undoubtedly heard, the FTC has issued a new set of guidelines surrounding "testimonial advertisements, bloggers and celebrity endorsements". This set of guidelines, which has not been altered since 1980, will greatly impact online publishing as we know it beginning December 1st. The biggest grey area to come out of the revised guidelines are the required disclosures between publishers and "advertisers". To quote: "bloggers who make an endorsement must disclose the material connections they share with the seller of the product or service.”
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