They say you don't know what you have til it's gone. They also say you don't know what you're missing. Which is it?

I never really realized the experience that I was lacking when buying a magazine off the newsstand.  Sure, none of us are going to look as amazing as Jennifer Lopez (double that comment when she's airbrushed), but does she look like me? Do we have anything in common outside of dark hair and dark eyebrows?

I had no idea that going to the newsstand to buy a magazine, whose cover model looked like me, would give me such a rush of satisfaction. It's as if purchasing the V Magazine's The Size Issue, featuring Gabourey Sidibe, repaired a hole in my heart in the same way that putty filled in holes in the walls of my apartment.

Granted, the size issue isn't perfect and contrary to the mass media hype, the issue features women of many sizes, shapes, genders and heights. Every photo featuring a plus size (or even generously proportioned) woman has been posted in every corner of the internet, and as I flip through the pages of the magazine, I begin to ask myself a few questions:

Did I buy this issue (admittedly, 4 copies) as the result of a carefully calculated and well-executed marketing campaign?

How do the advertisers (DSquared, Gucci, Louis Vuitton, Giorgio Armani) feel about the guant faces of their Spring ad campains sharing pages with women with visible fat rolls?

Why aren't plus size companies advertising in The Size Issue?

Even if this issue was born from a marketing initiative (and therefore, born of less than pure intentions), does it make the milestone any less significant?

Even though I've poured through every editorial featuring larger women prior to the issue's release, I find myself moved by seeing it in the large, highly glossed pages. The "One Size Fits All" layout featuring Crystal Renn is moving, inspiring and educational. Seeing Miss Dirty Martini sprawled across the interlocking c's on the floor of Chanel while being photographed by Karl Lagerfeld is a photo dreams are made of.

Was it worth it? Absolutely. To feel represented, even just during the moments that I held the glossy pages in my fingertips, my passion for pursuing self-confidence and self-acceptance were renewed. The media can sell me whatever images they think I want to see (and for the most part, they're right), but as long as I continue to maintain my self-confidence and strive for self-acceptance, no one will ever be able to take that from me.

Somewhere, deeply encoded within the advertising, the ultra-thin models and the thin/thick comparisons, are photographs of strong women who love & accept themselves.  These as the women deserve our praise, our love, our acceptance and our support - afterall, isn't being happy with who you are one of life's biggest challenges?

Either way, thank you, V Magazine. Message received.