As I was watching the premier episode of Running With Heels on Eye4Style, I realized I had far too many things to say about the show, and that I'd rather not keep imming my friends with constant comments. No, dear readers, I was going to put it in a post. You can watch the show along with me (see above) and tell me if you agree with my thoughts. Clearly this post makes me look like I have too much time on my hands (it's called procrastination), but I just felt so opinionated while watching I couldn't help myself.
0:01: This Fancast player is awful.
2:20: Apparently picking up a tiny dog is so much work, you need to ask a cab driver to put your carry-on suitcase in the trunk for you. Pansy.
2:25: "the talent of fashion" ?!?
2:46: If this is your first time in NYC, how did you get your "internship" with Marie Claire? Did they have a nation-wide casting call with a stop in Oshkosh, Wisconsin.
2:55: If you don't know anything about fashion and fashion magazines, why the hell are you on my computer screen right now?
3:17: If you haven't seen the apartment yet, where is that window that you're standing in front of?
3:23: Apartment search fail.
4:07: You are so excited? The look on your face says otherwise. Maybe you just realized the other 2 girls are as fake as you, dear.
4:15: Tell us how you really feel!
4:26: Maybe it's because you've already had so much Botox that half of your face is frozen. Just sayin'.
4:33: Who were your friends? Cows?
4:55: Be careful not to step in Chanel's pee in your Tory Burch flats.
5:20: Joanna Coles, fake it till you make it - enjoyable stress? Please.
6:30: Ouch - Is that why Marie Claire is doing so well?
6:40: Super cute shoes!
6:57: I actually believe her when she says she loves what she does. Maybe it's the accent.
7:35: Has this been a problem in the past?
8:00: She's a household name because of Project Runway - not because of her talent.
9:03: Expectation? Sweetie, we've watched you on tv, and you're not always so sweet.
9:11: Could she look less interested? Yes.
9:19: The way Nina is holder her hands, it looks like she is concocting an evil scheme. Yes please!
9:45: Start the suck-up parade.
10:02: End suck-up parade.
10:03: Don't have space to work? Wasn't a lack of work Elle's problem?
10:47: How do you look like a boy in sheer ruffles and a skirt? Oh, you don't. That's just your insecurities talking.
11:05: Now you look like a boy. It's not your clothes, it's the way you are sitting.
11:26: 2 million stories high? Oh wait, that's not the number of floors, that's how fast the circulation numbers are dropping.
11:39: I love how the blonde girl is carrying a Gucci logo bag with a floral print dress. They don't even have remotely the same color scheme, but because it's designer, she carries it like armor.
11:50: Bueller? Bueller?
12:55: Just plain ouch.
13:45: This girl looks like she's going to cry - all the time. Smile honey!
14:52: And we have our first tears. But the girl from 13:45 isn't the first to cry.
15:59: We agree wholeheartedly.
17:19: Naughty nautical? Oh right, MAC did that.
17:30: Thank you Nina. Finally some sense.
18:11: Funny, I don't see any green...
19:48: If you don't want to mess it up, you might try not crying all the time.
20:24: That dress looks remarkably like a bathrobe.
21:04: Can't show anyone what you're capable of doing honey if you can't open the door. Literally.
21:11: Don't further embarrass yourself by asking "How does this work?". It's a DOOR.
21:22: The poor little intern finally makes her way through the door. What a nail biter!
21:51: Perhaps you should have visited NYC before you moved here. It's called research.
22:10: Do cabs just magically stop without waving at them?
24:05: "There's piss on my trenchcoat." Classic.
24:09: Is Michael Kors the sponsor of the show? Or has he brainwashed Nina Garcia so much she's instructed the producers to make sure Michael's name appears once every minute.
24:20: The horror! Attending Fashion Week on Saturday - who ever heard of such a thing?!
25:17: Worried you won't have a moment with them? The models sit in chairs while someone paws at them with a nail polish brush, makeup brush or hair brush. Pretty simple.
25:31: Perhaps someone should have told Chanel's mommy that dogs need to be walked, loved and cared for. Maybe she should have brought her pet rock to NYC instead.
26:44: Chanel's mommy should probably have thought about who was going to be taken care of her precious one while she was away working.
28:18: That face? That one she's making? That's going to cause her to get wrinkles prematurely if she doesn't toughen up.
31:16: The showdown begins! "I wanted to go to Rock & Republic!" "No I wanted to go!" Why don't you both go sit down, shut up and visit style.com?
32:43: And we have our second meltdown.
34:03: Samantha (yes, by now I know their names), can we talk about your hair?
34:32: Either your jealousy is palpable or your bitch-face is obvious. How about both?
35:00: Do I smell another showdown? Samantha certainly does.
35:15: Sweetie, that face looks just like your hair. Please stop.
37:25: I know Joanna, I know. These things seem to make sense...
37:46: Running! In heels!
40:15: Bitchface kind of has a point.
40:27: Perhaps it's that you're perpetuating the myth that people from Wisconsin don't wear shoes?
/end
So here's what I have to say - the show idea is great. Marie Claire busted out of the box by doing a video podcast (Lord knows if that's still in production) which I quite enjoyed, but it wasn't a complete thought. It makes perfect sense for them to bring on Nina Garcia in a "hogging the spotlight" kind of way - See Nina. See Nina Work In Fashion. See Nina Work In Fashion In Front Of Cameras. Get my drift? Maybe it's done the magazine good, but in my opinion Stylista and the Fashionista Diaries were far better produced shows with far smarter cast members. The good thing? I've seen 2 Fashionista Diaries contestants and 1 Stylista contestant physically working during Fashion Week with my own eyes. By casting a girl who has never even been to NYC before on a magazine reality show, Marie Claire makes me sincerely question the "reality" of this show. You couldn't have at least interviewed her during Spring Break?
So, if you like pointless drivel, watch Running With Heels. There's sure to be plenty of drama, tears and catfights - the winning trifecta that we enjoy in all the other fashion-centric reality shows. Just don't expect a lot of reality.
